On Mail Searches and Fire Alarms

I *finally* received a package I've been waiting for from eBay (14 old Georgette Heyer paperbacks). I was so excited! Well, I pick up my package, and noticed that it has stamped on it in red ink something along the lines of "Inspected by the USPS" and "Media Mail: Inspected and Resealed." "What?" I think to myself: doesn't the post office trust me? Obviously not. Inside the package there is a printed note: "Media mail is only for items. . .blah blah blah. . .acceptable items are. . .blah blah blah" And so on for three paragraphs. At the bottom is a check mark in the box that says "Your items are acceptable." How kind of you to notice, I think sarcastically. Besides, what can I do about it if they aren't? I'm not the one who sent the package. Somehow this system seems messed up. Still, I have my books, and a whole lot of post office tape in my trashcan, so I guess I'm happy.

I know that fire alarms are good things, but it seems to me that a better system should be established, at least for college dorms. This past Saturday, at 10:05 or thereabouts, I hear a distant fire alarm. Unfortunately, it does not stay distant. It is soon joined by all its brother- and sister-alarms, including the one in my room. My roommate, who was still asleep, sits bolt upright in bed. "The fire alarm's going off." I say. She looks at me with an expression that clearly says "You don't say. I wouldn't have noticed." So we traipse down the five flights of the icky back stairs, and proceed around the building to the designated stop in front. Most of us probably wouldn't have bothered, except that we had no wish to go deaf. Hearing loss is certainly an often ignored side effect in such cases, but I digress. I had only woken up about ten minutes before, but I was very glad that I was up and dressed (a lot of people were in bathrobes). Some people were in the shower; several guys came out in their towels. (The girls who were in the showers went to their rooms and got dressed first). A fire truck came, and we were forced to wait out side for an additional twenty minutes. Of course it was a false alarm. Less that two months of college, and already I look on fire alarms with disgust. I can't image what my reaction will be in four years. Maybe super-strong earplugs.